War of the Roses on the Radio

"Got the feeling your Significant Other is cheating on you? Do they come home late? Does the phone ring and when you pick up they hang up? Stick's got a fool proof way to catch them in the act... War of the Roses! Fill out the form below... and Stick might help you catch the cheater red-handed!"

For anyone who is not in the Central Florida area and/or doesn't listen to XL106.7, the above is a "contest" of sorts that airs most afternoons. I don't listen every day, but when I do, the exchange goes something like this (all names except the DJ's have been made up):

To begin with a woman (let's say Heather), calls concerned that her boyfriend (Phil) is either cheating on her or she's not sure if he loves her or some other reason.

Stick: Hi, may I speak to Phil please?
Phil: Speaking.
Stick: My name is Rick from Roses Unlimited... (explains about giving away a free dozen roses in exchange for word of mouth advertising). Would you be interested?
Phil: Sure! That would be great. (One time a guy knew about War of the Roses, but that's a whole other story).
Stick: Who would you like send them to?
Phil: Amanda.
Stick: And the message for the card?
Phil (digging himself deeper): Last night (week, etc) was great. Let's do it again sometime. (or some rendition thereof).

At this point, Heather comes on the phone and cries/yells/swears at the guy for being a jerk.

Each time, I listen with horrified fascination as the guy says someone else’s name. I have yet to hear a guy say the name of the girl on the phone. And typically, I can’t stand to listen to the rest of the conversation. It’s embarrassing.

I would never claim to be an expert on relationships, but several common sense thoughts come to mind each time I do catch the show.

First of all, any woman who instigates the war of the roses already knows there is something wrong with the relationship. It could be that the guy is cheating or it could just be a trust issue on her part. Unfortunately, it tends towards the guy cheating.

Secondly, airing your dirty laundry on the radio is not going to solve or resolve anything. Communication should occur between the two people in the relationship alone or with a trusted therapist if necessary.

Thirdly, there have been cases where the men have made reasonable-sounding excuses for who they were sending roses to. (Of course, it could have been a lie. What’s one more, right?) But to give some men the benefit of the doubt, I would like to state clearly and without equivocation... red roses should be reserved for the girlfriend/wife/significant other/etc. Mothers and sisters maybe could get red roses, but why? Red is for passion. The co-worker who had a baby or best friend in the hospital should get some other flower.

Finally, the show presents both sexes to horrible advantage, but especially the men. While I understand that drama earns ratings, I would love to see a contest or show that puts a positive spin on relationships. I know there are good men out there and I’d like to see them highlighted.