A Year in Review - 2008

So now is the time when all good men and women (okay maybe not good and maybe not all, but it sounds better that way) take a look a the year that has passed and look forward to the year ahead.
Yep, it's almost New Year's Day and like many in the world, I'm considering the things that went right in the past twelve months and the things that went wrong. The goal for the coming year is to maintain/retain those things that worked, improve those things that didn't and just forget some of those things that need forgetting.
Physical Health
While I did not make progress on my weight loss goals for this year, I didn't really backtrack either. My weight and clothes size is essentially the same as last year. I did however train for and complete a bicycle century, so one big accomplishment physically. I rejoined the Y, one of my favorite places to work out and have been making a great effort to exercise regularly.
2009 Goal: Stop paying Weightwatchers! (ie. make goal and Lifetime)
Work
With the economy taking a downturn and layoffs happening left and right, it's not surprising that work has lost a little of its joy and excitement. For the last year, I have watched benefits decrease, employee morale lower and more work get piled up. Many people say be thankful you have a job and I am. However, I am also one of those people who feels that if you don't enjoy your job, it's not beneficial to you or the company.
2009 Goal: Rediscover the joy in architecture.
Relationships
This year was definite year for growth with friends and family.
2009 Goal: Let my friends and family know how much I love them and appreciate them in my life!
Travel
Paris at Christmas! Need I say more? Yes? Okay. I spent seven full days in Paris between December 19th and December 26th with a very good friend. We walked all over the city, tried scrumptious food, saw wonderful architecture (my opinion) and generally exhausted ourselves. It was so worth it and I have two yummy boxes of chocolates to enjoy into the New Year.
2009 Goal: Travel to the next place (Italy, Egypt, Thailand, who knows?).

Holidays and Travel

So this year for Christmas, I am not spending time with my family, I am not putting up a tree and I am not buy presents. This year, I go to Paris! or as I should say "Je vais a Paris pour le Noel." Cool, right? I've never been and I think this will the best time to see the City of Lights. From what I've heard, the lights are fantastic right now.

Voting Today

Hard to believe it's almost Election Day. Of course, one wonders if it will continue to be Election Day with all the early voting that's going on.
I am waiting in line at the library with a lot of other people. Two and a half hours worth of people. One great thing about this location is the built-in entertainment factor. Bored? Pick up a book. Easily a quarter of those waiting are perusing a book or some other reading material. It begs the question of how long it's been since some of them have read a book for pleasure.
In three more days, we'll know who will be the next president. And political ads will be over. I'm curious when we as a country forgot how to argue politics without spouting hate and lies? Or maybe it's always been this way? George Washington did warn against a two party political system and maybe these last elections are part of the reason.
There's a basic problem with the system that with all the people in this nation, we don't all fit into one or two categories. And when you insult a particular candidate, you're insulting someone's mother, father, sister, brother, etc. All because they disagree with you on how the government should be run? Seriously, it doesn't make any sense. We're all human. We have thoughts,feelings and make mistakes.
Now granted, there are politicians out there who abuse the power they have been given, but I prefer to think that they are the exception. Most are just doing the best that they can to make the world a better place.
So I'm saying no to partisan politics and all the fear tactics. I've found both Republicans and Democrats that I feel will represent me well.
Maybe someday we'll find a way to heal the great divide in this country.

Spending a Century on a Bike

Actually, it all started Saturday night. I made sure to head to bed at a reasonable hour the night before the ride, about 10:15. Before falling asleep, I lay in bed with my eyes closed and took a few slow, deep breaths. I thought to myself. “I am going to wake up tomorrow and have a wonderful ride.” And I did.

Sunday started off with perfect weather for a bike ride. Just before 8 AM, the temperature was in the high 50s or low 60s. Sunshine was expected all day with a bit of wind… Okay, more than a bit of wind. It had rained for two days previous and the natural follow-up included wind.

Downtown Cocoa is rather quaint with tiny roads and buildings jammed up next to each other and the road in all directions. From the start, we headed north on Indian River Road towards Titusville. A group of about six of my teammates and I stayed together in one pace line for the bulk of the first 40 miles. Made for a fairly speedy trip (in my book) and easier pedaling. The course was mostly flat with a few low rises. This is Florida after all.

The real fun began after the second SAG (Safety And Gear) stop at mile 40. Our team cycling coach had caught up with us and I opted to stay behind, since I knew I was starting to fall behind from the group and I don't like riding by myself! It’s also nice to have someone with you who is required to be the last one across the finish line.

Anyway, pulling out from the SAG stop, I realized my back tire was flat. Oh, joy! Luckily, we’re required to carry a spare tube, so about 10-15 minutes later; I had a newly inflated tire. Ready to go. Unfortunately, about ¼ of a mile down the road, it went flat again! Double joy! This time we patched both tubes and replaced one. Off again!

About two miles later, we started heading south, which meant the wind was behind us. This made for very easy pedaling and quite brisk speeds. Until… you guessed it. A pop and a rush of air. Another flat. Now it should be noted that all three flats were on the back tire, completely unrelated, except that maybe the tread was too worn on the tire. After a quick fix, we were on the road again. This time the adventure of flat tires was over!

The next 30 miles were fairly uneventful. Some wind, some sun, stops ever 15 miles or so and lots of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Yes, it is possible to get tired of them! We rode through some very interesting neighborhoods. One minute we’re next to million dollar mansions right on the Intercoastal and a few miles later, the homes are a step above a double wide. Coach even noted how some people’s money was in the house and some people’s money was in the toys out front (ie RV, boat, etc). Says a lot about the people living in the area.

Right about 80 miles into the ride we started making our way back north towards the finish line. Here, the wind picked up quite briskly and speed was definitely affected negatively. However, we battled our way through the next 22.5 miles to finally make it back where we started.

My teammates were waiting to cheer me on as a reached the finish line. They even went so far as to create a finish line for me out of toilet paper! What friends!

So after 102.5 miles on the bike, my rear hurt, my knees ached and every muscle in my body was stiff from sitting in one position for too long, but I still smiled.

Returning to Normal

In less than 48 hours I should be finished with my first bicycle century. For those of you that don't know, that's 100 miles on a bicycle. And the seat's not large! As I sit here contemplating the last few months, I'm amazed at all the hard work and preparation that went into this accomplishment.
Sunday will be the culmination of a physical and philanthropic journey. Two years ago, I joined the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society’s Team in Training to complete a marathon and raise funds for the society’s programs. Earlier this year, I took up cycling regularly for the first time in my life. Wanting to learn more about bicycles and cycling as a sport, I remembered that Team in Training also had cycling teams.
Finding out when then next season started, I signed up to ride in the Intracoastal Waterway Century. As part of that commitment, I agreed to fundraise $2,300 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. What I did was take a personal desire and transformed it into a worthy goal.
In the past five months, I have learned to fix a flat, repair a chain, keep hydrated, eat properly and increased endurance. These were the physical things I earned in my journey to this weekend.
However, I have also learned more about blood cancers, heard touching stories of how people’s lives have been affected by disease and renewed my faith that people are caring, thoughtful individuals who want to help one another.
An added bonus to this whole endeavor are the new people I have met—hopefully some will be friends for years to come. I am honored to have met a wide variety of people from all walks of life.
So after Sunday, my life will return to some semblance of normalcy. No more Sunday rides and back to regular Weightwatchers meetings and yoga. My project for the next couple of months is going to be me!

The Importance of Dreams

I am currently reading The Dreaming Universe by Fred Alan Wolf. It is at times confusing, enlightening, interesting and frustrating. Today’s chapter dealt with the brain’s awareness and reaction to stimulus. Apparently, it is possible for a person to react to a stimulus (breaking to avoid hitting an animal running across the road) before becoming aware that the animal crossed the road. Somehow when the brain processes the information, it actually can send signals back in time in order to allow an automatic reaction.
The whole concept seems rather far-fetched until you start thinking about times when you may have reacted to something before you realize what you’re doing. I wonder if this could be the cause of many cases of “foot in mouth” disease. How often have you said something only to wish a split second later that you hadn’t? I think everyone probably has one instance of this in their life.
This relates to one part of the lunch and learn discussion that I posted about yesterday. The speaker mentioned that humans are wired to respond rapidly with the truth when approached.
Example:
“How are you doing?”
“Oh, just terrible! The project is falling behind. I can’t get anyone to finish any work.”
or
“Great! I just achieved a great milestone on my current project.”
While both of the responses above are valid, honest answers to the question, which person do you want to continue the conversation with? The second person, of course. So your attitude can influence others opinions, thoughts and actions.
In the above scenario, what do you think would happen if the person asking the question had an exciting new project ready to get started and he or she was preparing to offer you the project and they had received the first answer? They probably would rethink their offer.
Consider that in your interactions with others and how a fairly innocuous interaction could have larger implications.
And as the speaker suggested, when asked any of the following questions:
“How’s business?”
“How is your health?”
“How are you?”
Simply answer energetically, “Unbelievable!”
This single word can cover everything from “My business is going further in the red every month” to “My fiancé just proposed. I’m getting married!” Whether the situation is good or bad, use this word to convey a positive an upbeat attitude.
Who knows where it will lead?

Life Evaluation - Part II

The lunch and learn at the office today was another one of those, "Here's a tidbit of information about something... Sign up for more information for a special, one time fee of blank dollars!" While the information was interesting, I refuse to spend $295 on a single day workshop.
Interestingly enough, the concepts they discussed this afternoon are very similar to the Law of Attraction as described by James Arthur Ray in Harmonic Wealth. So I think I'll stick with the book on CD that I borrowed from the library and complete the exercises as suggested.

Life Evaluation - Part I

This post begins a series of posts inspired by books and articles I've read, movies I've seen and seminars I've attended. The theme of all these pieces relate to life evaluation. Identifying where you are, where you want to be and how to get there.

At 31, I'm fairly content with my life, but that's no reason not to want more! I do not believe the statement "If it ain't broke, don't fix it" applies to all aspects of life. Even if a part of your life is clicking along fairly decently, there's nothing wrong with making it better.

Thus, I start with my gratitude list. This idea was inspired from watching the movie, based on the book, The Secret. I’ll admit that when I heard the book generally talked about, I was a bit cynical at first. Getting things in life by just thinking about them? Nothing’s quite that easy. Well, after watching the movie, I realized it wasn’t quite as simplistic as that, but I won’t go into quantum physics, etc. here. Incidentally, the movie was very interesting and had a lot of guest speakers who have lead me to other books that I have started reading.

I am grateful for:
a supportive mother who always believed I could and made sure I knew it.
a sister who loves me no matter what and will always be my first defender as well as my “what about this?” voice.
friends who laugh with me, cry with me, play with me and work with me.
a crazy cat that isn’t codependent.
the ability to heal from life’s minor and major setbacks, both physically and emotionally.
the endurance to finish a 60-mile bike ride. Soon 100 miles!
an inquiring mind that always wants to know more.
books to read on every subject imaginable, from the serious to the fluffy.
the ability to support myself independent of anyone.
the ability to recognize when I need help and ask for it.

This is a good starting place. There are a lot of things in my life that make me feel grateful. Hopefully, I’ll be adding to them soon.

Another note about The Secret… When I watched the movie, there were many guest speakers participating in the video. I really liked what several of them had to say, so I checked some of their books out of the library.

The Dreaming Universe by Fred Alan Wolf
The Spiritual Universe by Fred Alan Wolf
Harmonic Wealth by James Arthur Ray

Dear World...

It seems to me that the world has become extraordinarily unbalanced in recent years. How can there be so many with so little while a small number have an overabundance. And before anyone starts thinking socialism, etc. Let's look at some other aspects of life.
For example, here in the US we have over 60% of adults over 20 are either overweight or obese (by a questionable unit of measure, but still...). In other words, we eat too much. Anyone who has made any effort to lose weight knows that basic formula for weight loss is calories in must be less than calories expended. In other words, you have two ways to lose weight. Move more or eat less. The fact that such a large percentage of the population of one country can be obese while another country struggles to get the minimum of food to their citizens makes you wonder.

Letting Go

We all have things in our lives that we hold on to-memories, possessions, relationships, weight, etc. Some of these things nurture us while others become harmful drags on time and resources. One of our responsibilities in life is evaluate the people, places and things in our lives and determine their proper place.
Sometimes the decision is easy. "I don't like liver" for example. This quite easily relegates liver to something you won't eat. However, some decisions are not quite that cut and dry. In fact, making a determination on one aspect of your life may in fact bring to light other decisions that need to be made.
"Do I want this friend in my life?" becomes a much more involved process. First you have to determine what qualities the person brings to your life, both positive and negative. How do you feel around them? Happy? Sad? Angry? Content? Frustrated? At east? When you spend time together, do you think about what you're doing together or are you contemplating the moment you are able to leave their company? Consider your history together. Did they serve a purpose in your life at one point that is no longer necessary. Perhaps their companionship helped you through a rough patch or crisis that is over. Is their friendship still a strong, vibrant part of your life or is it waning and draining.
Once you've made the decision to let a friendship go, the next step is determining the method of release. Sometimes, you can let time and distance do the parting. A gradual drift. Not making the effort to spend time together. In the case of toxic relationships, it may be necessary to actually tell the person why you are no longer spending time with them.

Two Shameless Plugs

First Shameless Plug
Some of you may know, some of you may not. My mother is an independent publisher who helps Maine authors and poets publish their works. The books she publishes include poems, non-fiction and a selection of a few fiction pieces. Essentially, the offerings represent a cross section of Maine culture. Check out her website at http://www.jstwrite.com.

Second Shameless Plug
One of my mother's authors is H. R. Coursen, a nationally-recognized Shakespearean scholar, writer, teacher and poet. You can experience a taste of his work at his newly started blog, http://hrcoursen.blogspot.com. His writing is at times thought-provoking, enjoyable and far-reaching in scope.

Corporate Bailout - Part II

So since I started writing the earlier post this morning, watched some financial news program on TV. How does anyone know what to believe when they watch TV, read the paper or listen to the radio? But that's another blog. Someone asked the question, what would happen if the bailout doesn't go through? The answer given by this man was that companies would stop lending money, which would lead to companies not making payroll, which would lead to more layoffs. Is this really the world we live in? Use news to incite fear and allow our chosen representatives to potentially bankrupt our country and future generations? I'd like to know why our Congress people can't put aside their partisan politics to come up with workable, financially-sound solutions. Is this asking too much?

Corporate Bailout - Part I

So this $700 billion dollar bailout that is currently being debated in Congress... What? Debated? How is this plan even given the justification of being debated! Shelve it! And amazingly enough, it appears to be something that most Americans you meet on the street agree with. No corporate bailouts!
I had an idea a few weeks ago and then recently I've heard financial analysts discussing. If we're going to spend the money, come up with a program that allows owner-occupants who are in danger of losing their homes to refinance into a mortgage that they can afford the monthly payments. Lower the interest rate, extend the length of the mortgage. Whatever necessary to allow people to keep their homes. This serves several purposes:
1. Potential foreclosures will go down.
2. Debts will not be defaulted, and payments will be made.
3. Fewer homes will fall into disrepair and neglect because people live there, helping to maintain property values.

Such is the misery of too much sleep!

My eyes are gummy as I fight the urge to shut them again. It's almost as if there are magnets on each lid, attracting each other. Slowly and grudgingly, I role to one side in preparation to sit up. Through bleary vision, I attempt to read the glowing, red letters on the alarm clock. 2:00 PM! Shocked, there is no longer a need to fight sleep. Panic has set in and, strangely, I feel no need to languish in bed. Jumping up, I stumble to the dresser, off balance from the quick movement. My body hasn't quite caught up to the commands of my brain. MOVE! Scrambling through the drawers for clothes that hopefully match when I put them on. Thank God, it's Saturday and not a week day. No work to miss, but all my plans for the day. Laundry, shopping, bike ride and more! I know I turned off the lights at 11:00 last night. How could I have slept for fifteen hours?

I check my phone for any messages and strangely there are none. Odd, since I usually hear from family and friends on Saturdays. They know it's the best day to reach me. Resigned, I hop in the shower and fly through my typical morning routine. Hair, face, body. Spin, spin, spin. Should have practiced the "Airborne Shower" more in college.

After dressing, I check the phone again. No messages. Maybe it's not so bad. Feed the cat. Gather the laundry. Pull together my cycling gear. One last look around the house and I open the door.

Darkness greets me through the door frame. Confused, I gaze down on the deserted parking lot. One high street light throws illumination between my building and the one opposite. This isn't right. Closing the door, I check my phone one more time. With a growing unease I read the time with a fully alert gaze. 2 AM! Back to sleep I go.

A Woman Waits

A woman waits for a knock at the door, unsure what to expect. Trying to stay calm, her gaze drifted to her surroundings, not settling for any length of time before moving to the next point of interest. The small room gives the impression that someone took some effort to make the space seem comfortable. Softly patterned wallpaper covers the walls with a picture frame located on the one opposite her perch. A pastel, watercolor-style print depicts a beach scene from a house porch. Carpet and soft seating complete the impression of a cozy corner appropriate for chatting or reading. Along one wall, a sterile counter covered with small jars and boxes stands in stark contrast to the rest of the room. It would be difficult to feel fully at ease after viewing the implements laid out within easy reach. This is not a place for chatting or reading.

From the hall, she hears hushed voices and the swish of clothes as people walk by her door. Every time someone pauses, she holds her breath, waiting for the sound that said she would be joined. She shivers slightly from a combination of chills and anticipation. Her mind races, jumping from one possible scenario to another, before she forces herself to examine her surroundings again.

A light tap on the door indicates her doctor has returned. Whether the news is good or bad, her life will change irrecoverably.

It was as if...

It was as if reality blurred. For one moment, the image of a castle super-imposed itself over the splintered stump. Spiked turrets and high walls separated it from the surrounding landscape.
The foreboding structure was softened by the greenery spilling over every surface. It is easy to imagine sunlight caressing the slender figures of elves as they make their way through their city.
The image blurs again, leaving the overgrown stump highlighted by sunlight coming through the trees above.